Happy Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day is an mixed day for me. My mum has passed, she’s been gone for over ten years now. You never know how things might change in life, and her passing was one of those things. I’ve learnt to treat this day like any other. One year, I even went on a first date! My mum would’ve thought it alright to do, and seen the funny side to it all. While it didn’t work out with that guy, it was one of the best dates I’ve had. You never can predict these things!

Last year was different.

Last year was my first Mother’s Day as a mum, and it was super special, and also a blur, as bubs was only three weeks old.

This year it will be different again, as he’s over one, but still unaware of what the day means. The day is becoming more meaningful for me. But really everyday feels like Mother’s Day with him. And the day is so much more about being a mum. This year, I’m catching up with family, and we’re celebrating the day together. It’s an excuse for us to make time for each other, and take time out of our busy lives. It’s not so much about it being about Mother’s Day, but being a family, and being together – and celebrating that.

Wishing you all a Happy Mother’s Day!

 

 

New Writing Spot

It might seem a usual place one might write – on your bed. But this is one place I don’t write. Maybe I might jot down a few notes at 3am when my mind thinks it has come up with some wonderful idea, which I usually consider lame at 7am. That doesn’t count as writing.

I’ve never written while on my bed. I never studied on my bed. Now, out of necessity I have. Bubs was sleeping and there was a lot of noise downstairs with the council work ripping up the path for some reason. I needed to be near bubs, so I could hear him when he woke. So, I set up to write on my bed, lap top on my lap, with a cup of tea (not the usual coffee), and got writing. The dog was on the floor near me (bed is out of bounds for him), and I’m comfortable and inspired, despite the jack-hammering noise outside.

cup of tea and writing.jpgInstead of allowing the noise, and the disruption to bother me, I adapted to my environment, and got on with the writing project I needed to do. Bubs slept. I wrote. The dog was happy. I even enjoyed drinking my cup of tea during the session.

Then when bubs woke, I had a little writing to finish, so he played on my bed while I wrote. Then my computer was packed up, and we played for a while.

This sounds easy, but I don’t really like writing on my bed. By allowing myself to adapt to the situation at hand, I got to write, bubs slept, and then we got time together.

I’ve often have had Charles Darwin’s quote in mind:

“It’s not the most intellectual of the species that survives; but the species that survives is the one that is able to adapt and to adjust best to the changing environment in which it finds itself.”

While I might be still at home, my environment is constantly changing with bubs. It’s not always easy to adapt in the moment. I now know what this can be for me in a simple form. Which means I can do this again more easily in the future. And instead of coffee, I enjoyed a cup of tea, and reduced my caffeine intake. Lots of little wins all around!

Have you had a simple moment when you’ve adapted in order to create? Please share below in the comments.

Plan B

Having to drive over the other side of town for an appointment, I thought a I could combine the trip and then go to one of my favourite cafés. I had to drive past the café on the way to the appointment, and it was closed. And not a closed for today, or opening late today sort of closed. It had shut up shop. Forever. I had so been looking forward to being naughty and buying a cheeky lamington with my coffee, and spending a little time writing (or trying to write as bubs was with me).

What was I going to do now? Plan B wasn’t forming in my mind. Simply I needed another café. But where? And there’s always the risk of trying a new café and it let’s say, things don’t always work out. I was in a risk free mood, and yet, here I was having to do that. I wasn’t in the frame of mind to try something new or different to my routine or what I was used to.

Through the appointment all I could think of was where am I going to have my morning coffee where I can write? I wanted to go to a café where I could take a pram, and one where there was a bit of a rustic, organic vibe to help the creative flow. I wanted to soak up the atmosphere so the inspiration would stay with me for the rest of the day.

It took a lot of thinking, then I remembered a café down the road I had gone to earlier in the year. Relief! And it was the perfect solution. I had a lovely coffee, room with the pram and a few minutes to write. Beautiful organic vibes for me to absorb. Thank goodness! And I’ve got another café to add to my list to go and visit.

All wasn’t lost.

It’s obvious to think there’s not really any risk here, and that it’s simple just think of another café to go to. In a way it was. But it did take a bit of thought for me to work through this. And it reminded me of the process of problem solving. The chance to think on my feet. And to be flexible with the pre-made plans of the day. I also got to practice it for something simple, so when the big problems come along I’ll be ready.

So there’s a lot more than just plan B and having to go to a different café. It’s all about being willing to try something different, to change the plans – on the fly. And to remember that this can actually help the inspiration and lead to some creative progress.

I might just need to try a new café more regularly!

 

Art Classes with Bubs

As a new mum, there’s a lot to juggled. Maybe I don’t need to be going along to art class, I’m not sure I’ve got the time or if I can really afford it. But then my soul needs nourishment, and for me it’s natural to go along to art class with bubs. Can’t start them too young! So far bubs has been exposed to university, art classes, Pilates, and a creativity writing workshop I presented. His education is about to continue with an upcoming conference I’m presenting at. There’s lots of variety for him to experience, even now, just by me simply living my life.

During art class, Bub is in the sling, resting on my chest as I paint. He’s content. The other ladies in the class are amused, nothing like a little baby energy in the room to help with the creativity! Instead of a tea break half-way through the class, for me there’s a bottle break. I can use the time to chill, and also reflect what direction I want to take my painting (which I’m having to go to plan B because I’ve stuffed up! And Bubs has been such an angel I can’t even blame him. Completely my lesson to learn here!). I’m very grateful for Splashout to help accommodate by letting me come along with bubs.

my art in need of fixing

By going along to art class, I’m reminded that my mum did something similar. She had her baby daughters in the wicker bassinets, under the table, while she did her china painting. It’s what the women in our family do. It’s a tradition. And I’m glad to be continuing it. The quiet things you’ve learnt from mum, which you then pass down to your child; an unexpected bonus, which also helps keep my memory of mum alive.

Lilliana

Blessed

This morning when writing in a café I was interrupted by a lady. Nothing unusual for that to happen to me. I give off some vibe, or I’m like a light to moths, and people come to talk to me when I’m writing in cafés.

What was different about today was, that bubs wasn’t happy to be in his pram, so he was in my arms. It had been an effort to get out of the house, into the car, and to the café. But I had persisted. Left my phone behind which always causes me to feel naked. Also left one of the notebooks I wanted to write in at home. But I had made it to the café, the computer was open, and while not ideal I could sort of type one handed while holding bubs. What was really happening was that bubs was getting cuddles, and nothing was getting written. At least I could have my thinking time and ponder on what I wanted to write (which was a middle grade book, based on a story idea I had written about 7 years ago, so there was plenty to ponder).

Then when I was rocking gently side to side, cuddling bubs, staring at my screen, my mind deep in the world I wanted to create, an elderly lady came up to me. She said, ‘Bless you.’

I wasn’t sure what was going on, but I smiled. It’s a good thing to say to someone, right? Even if not religious. Then she repeated her blessing. ‘Bless you both.’

I responded with ‘thanks’. Then she said I’d made her day seeing us there.

She asked what his name was and thought Shephard was a lovely name. It connected deeply to her, and justified her actions in coming to bless us both. She told me we had made her day by seeing us.

It’s interesting the symbolic world that we live in. Shephard has a religious connotation (not at all why I choose this name for him) along with the lady’s action of blessing me. Something deeper here was going on perhaps. Either way it was a lovely interaction with a stranger.

Then she said it was lovely to meet us, and went on her way. All of us, her and me and bubs, with much lighter hearts as we continued the day.

(And do you know what I kid you not, as I write this and post it we’ve just received another blessing, this time from an elderly man. The angels are with us today.)

Lilliana